and it's Good Night from HIM!

Well it is Panto Season, and Ronnie Barker was part of Christmas for ages, so when I got this email... see if anyone can read it through without cracking up! This was originally shown on BBC TV, back in the seventies. Ronnie Barker could say all this without a snigger (though god knows how many takes) The irony is that the BBC received not one complaint. Must have been the speed of delivery was too much for the whining herds. Try getting through it without converting the spoonerisms as you read; -- -- --

The sugly isters were right bugly astards. One was called Mary Hinge,and the other was called Betty Swallocks; they were really forrible huckers; they had fetty sweet and fetty swannies.

The sugly isters had tickets to go to the ball, but the cotton runtswould not let Rindercella go. Suddenly there was a bucking fang, and her gairy fodmother appeared. Her name was Shairy Hithole and she was a light rucking fesbian.She turned a pumpkin and six mite wice into a hucking cuge farriage with six dandy ronkeys who had buge hollocks and dig bicks The gairy fodmother told Rindercella to be back by dimnlight otherwise, there would be a cucking falamity.

At the ball, Rindercella was dancing with the prandsome hince when suddenly the clock struck twelve."Mist all chucking frighty!!!" said Rindercella, and she ran outtripping barse over ollocks, so dropping her slass glipper.

The very next day the prandsome hince knocked on Rindercella's door and the sugly isters let him in. Suddenly, Betty Swallocks lifted her leg and let off a fig bart. "Who's ust jarted??" asked the prandsome hince. "Blame that fugly ucker over there!!" said Mary Hinge. When the stinking brown cloud had lifted, he tried the slass glipper on both the sugly isters without success and their feet stucking funk.Betty Swallocks was ducking fisgusted and gave the prandsome hince a knack in the kickers. This was not difficult as he had bucking fuge halls and a hig bard on. He tried the slass glipper on Rindercella and it fitted pucking ferfectly. Rindercella and the prandsome hince were married. The pransome hince lived his life in lucking fuxury, and Rindercella lived hers with a follen swanny.